


Ass Craving

by kogafuta



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-22
Updated: 2014-10-22
Packaged: 2018-02-22 04:39:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2494784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kogafuta/pseuds/kogafuta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>no one eats ass im sorry, a kuroterudai fic</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ass Craving

Kuroo meets a boy, his nema was Eugene, but likes to be called teru. “Kuroo senpai” fuckin weeb Eugene is a godamn weeb fukc u teru. “yes teru” he wininicees from the blonde headed fuckboy stoner “wat u want foo” say the crow headed lazy adidas flip flop tube sock cat fuck boy “ do u have dai-senpai’s digit” “wow no u creep” “yeah u do, u fuckin g stalk him” “bro are you stalking me” “bruh” KURROOS GIved inn, he gave the number to teru boy 420 “YAAASSSS thank kuroo, u knowwo I think u cool two” really?? “ yeah like super cool……………………………………..and cuute yeahs” he bloooshed

Daichi looks at his phon e “wh at the fuck “ and it only shows unkownnw nombre (teru numero telefono) it was just “hey J” “who this be” “me ;)” “please stop texting me “ “haha and then wut ;)” Daichi goes blockn the digits anmn d calls kuron “KUROO” “ what son” why thi s” “why hwat” *shows messages* “ohh” “kuroo why did u do thing” “because I like him and you , like can we all hang I think u would like him” “no” “

Why can’t you want me like the other boys do?

They stare at me while I stare at you

Why can’t I keep you safe as my own?

One moment I have you the next you are gone

Rehearsed steps on an empty stage

That boy’s got my heart in a silver cage

Why can’t you want me like the other boys do?

They stare at me while I crave you”

“what” “nothing please cume” “ok”

Teru come over to kuroos house “eyy what we gonna do today” “well we gonna pick up Daichi” SWEET BRO” “but first we gotta do this “ kuroo pulls out bagged milk like the Canadian fukc k he is “why not juggeded milkys” ‘STFU TEUR” “ok” teru then goes ??? mode “what we gonna do with this” “well to get dai chans attention, we need to chunk something at his window” why not ppeble” because “ clich’e”” ohoho” (bokuto here drinking all of kurroos apple juice (its not appllel juice (it marijuana))) “ok” they leave bokut with his weed apple juice (its oregano fucking dumass) they drive and end up at daichis house at 12 am he is asleep. Kuroo gets out the bagged milk “ok chunk these teru” but will it wake him up “ yee that’s what we doing” but what about the sercuruity??” don t worry teru I got this “ he holds up some wires “bu t what about..” “CHUNK THE BAGGED MILK EUGENE” he hits Daichi widow spoot on, just white milk everywhere, kagayam and grandpa hinat and tsukki walk by . kagers has le heart attack all that milk gne, sad piss, then hiinatsukki happened over dead kageyamss boody (for u fin)

WT F THIGHCHI sRCEBAMESSD” HEY ;))))” “sup ;pp” Daichi looks at the idiots “what do at 12 am, what about school ‘ “we rebels” “yeah us punks r going to weenie hut jr wanna hang “ “sorry but suga and tomorrow are going to the salty spittoon I m sorry”

“but suga is lame “ “suga kicked ur ass kuroo” (don’t fighgt suga, u will lose an eye if unprepared) suga pops out of the dark “I am THE FINAL BOSS TO GEYT TO THE PRINCESS” teru like “wtf seriously “ suga shoots out a lazzzer beamu “wTF” TE RU SCREMAMDED “AAAH WHAT DO KUROO “ *KUroo hops the fence* “GODAMNIT KURPOO” teru had to fight off mecha suga, he didn’t know what to do then he thinks back to when bobata and him had that weird crotch grabbing scenario that me and lu made I mean canonically happened and bobatas booty said “teru…..this is gay” he says out loud “bu t….they do it in the beisbal” he realizedded …grab mecha sugas schlong. He grabs it and throws him where the milk be all over the place, cuz milk from a bag is a robots weaknenensess (thn x canandna land) kuroo pops out “I knew we could do it” “y ou didn’t do an” ‘I KNEW WE COULD DO IT” then Daichi climbs down and says “thank u my brave heroes for smaving meme” “wait that isn’t Daichi” it be oikawa “ wait ur not iwa chan, hana-chan, or matsu- chan wtf” did daich I gives wrong assdress I think he did” sad kuroo teruru go home as thaey comptimlagte what happen “well I still like u kuroo senpai” “same “ they kisses “but I still love diachi moar” “sAME” they pulel out a photog of Daichi and kisses it “we will date him….oone day”

TH EHEND

**Author's Note:**

> I wanna thank lu, fin, and faye for giving me the sstrenght t00 write this massterpeace, my inspa came from me walking through the forest of moccasin breath, when I saw a troll boy wearing tight pants, I want to own them but could he dance in those pants “WATCH ME WOMAN” he made them move like a vessel of shimmy ta ta ta all sweet and tender like a tiny baby kitty ooo I need to get some put my body in them then I will rule the world. 5678 Is thatangel babiy no that’s his dance move yes watch my lady honey grooves, feed me lots of Jamba Juice, call me lady tiger, but I never eat my young no no, my legs in those pants the dream , my body moves and screams watch out for my body rolls, watch out for my body rolls, high kicks, high kicks this is how we do it!
> 
> REvieiws: UsA today says: we gotta eat a good lasaga
> 
> Texas monthly worote: hey call me ;))


End file.
